The Hand That Feeds (File 0/15)

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Episode 002
The Hand That Feeds (File 0/15)

Did you lose my I9?

Blogger Agent Penn
Date Posted November 7th, 2008
Description We could've waterboarded him. I'm just saying.
YouTube Tags zero-sum zero sum opzerosum linc order denderah home office

Linc Logan Rapp
Agent Penn Unknown
Adjacent Blogs
Previous "Floodgates"
Next "The Beginning of the End (File 1/15)"

The Hand That Feeds (File 0/15) is the second video in The Home Office video series.


(Static appears on screen, eventually forming an image of Linc with his head tilted down)

Agent Penn: (synthesized voice) Name for the record?

Linc: (Looks up) Thomas Jefferson Russell.

Penn: Callsign?

Linc: Linc.

Penn: When did you begin your employment at the Home Office?

Linc: That's funny, I didn't get a check. Did you lose my I9?

Penn: Answer the question please.

Linc: Three weeks ago.

Penn: For what purpose?

Linc: (sarcastic) Community service.

Penn: We'll move on. You used to work for the Order of Denderah, whom we subvert at every turn. You have maimed and murdered young girls who were bred for many years. Why are you here now?

Linc: Their severance package wasn't to my liking.

Penn: By which you mean, upon failing objective after objective, they put a burn order out on you and your team. Your incompetence put a mark for death on you and everyone you worked with.

Linc: Every village needs its idiot.

Penn: Is that what you are to us? Now, you can be our idiot a while?

Linc: Hey, you sought me out. Not the other way around. Maybe you should fire your recruiters.

Penn: I want to know where your loyalties are.

Linc: Well it ain't with you jackasses. And it ain't with the crazy ass cult either.

Penn: If they were so crazy, why did you work with them in the first place? You were so dedicated to the cause that you volunteered to be more proactive? You took weapons training with a religious order. Didn't that fire off some alarms?

Linc: Not to the cause.

Penn: What?

Linc: The cause wasn't what I was dedicated to.

Penn: Mr. Russell. You think that in your most recent so-called "community service," that you and your team were successful?

(long pause)

Linc: Define successful.


  • Agent Penn entered #TheHomeOffice Chat shortly before the video was posted.

#TheHomeOffice Chat

<HO16051414> The beginning is what's new.

<HO16051414> The Home Office is recruiting analysts for low-level, low-risk assignments.

<HO16051414> Success in these assignments will bring about more.

<HO16051414> There have been questions about us. Who we are about.

<HO16051414> What has happened to subject #12-09-14-03.

<HO16051414> Some will be answered.

<HO16051414> You have been previously notified of this.

<HO16051414> And in less than an hour, we will begin to make good on our promise.

<ApotheosisAZ> it'll be midnight on the west coast

<HO16051414> Which is the time zone we primarily reside in.

<HO16051414> It won't be long. Upon viewing the video, should you decide to continue working with us, we have a simple task: Recruit.

<HO16051414> Inquire away.

<HO16051414> Linc is in the process of debriefing. Beyond that, the answers will be forthcoming within the hour.

<HO16051414> Just as we must build trust with you, reciprocity is the key to a lasting relationship.

<JenLight_> Why should we trust you?

<HO16051414> Within the hour, you may decide that for yourself.

<LimePenguin> What can we call you? Home?

<ApotheosisAZ> 16-05-14-14

<HO16051414> Apo - translate the numbers. You may call me that when you do.

<JenLight_> penn

<HO16051414> Very good.

<HO16051414> Within the hour. Keep your eyes open. We will be in touch.

<HO16051414> Signing off.

HO16051414 has left #thehomeoffice

Message From the Home Office

Home Office said:
From: Home Office

Date: Fri, Nov 7, 2008 at 1:55 AM Subject: [12-09-14-03] Retrieved Data To:

Agent Penn -

Cargill reported in earlier last night with subject in tow. He is docile, though less-than-happy to be here. On his person were backups for the recent operation's video footage, a small, 128MB thumb drive, with a note attached, and two plane tickets to Venezuela, departing two weeks from now.

The thumb drive contained only one file - an image (see attached). What's the story on this?

There seems to be nothing on the handwriting, the text of which is simply: "When she's depressed she goes bowling."

Answers are not going to be forthcoming from the subject. He seems to be uncooperative simply out of spite. We'll have to figure this one on our own.

Report back with any findings ASAP.
The Home Office Characters
Main Characters Linc · Julie · Summer · Michael · Agent Penn · The Director
Additional Characters Pete · 7 · Agent Cargill · Nash · Nicolai Black