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Gemma's tool Suspiciously Absent
Joined: 01 Nov 2006 Posts: 2
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Posted: Wed Nov 01, 2006 4:14 pm Post subject: Little known facts about Gemma's hot-nisity |
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Those living near Gemma, especially young children and the elderly, are encouraged to limit their exposure and stay indoors when possible.
It was long thought that one could find a picture of Gemma beside the definition of hot in many dictionaries. These claims are of course patently absurd - it is widely known that even a picture of Gemma is capable of igniting paper, and there are no dictionaries printed upon paper made from asbestos pulp or similar less-flammable materials.
Salsa at restaurants and grocers everywhere is now available in three varieties - mild, medium and Gemma.
It is wise to wear only natural fibers (if anything) in Gemma's presence. When engulfed in flame, synthetics tend to leave an unpleasant odor and bond to skin.
Growing up, as the extent of her hotness became increasingly apparent, Gemma was affectionately called "Kelvin" by family and friends alike.
Using only the considerable heat generated by her body, Gemma once saved a man from death by hypothermia - entirely unbeknown to her and from a distance of over three miles.
Al Gore's second feature-length documentary, "A Smoking Hot Truth," examines controversial evidence linking Gemma to rapid melting of the polar ice caps.
Gemma has never seen snow, nor ice. Both are as mysterious to her as her impossibly full lips are to you and me. |
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Mirage Hymn of One
Joined: 15 Sep 2006 Posts: 8655 Location: I say! I'm going to crush your city!
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Posted: Wed Nov 01, 2006 4:21 pm Post subject: |
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Al Gore's second feature-length documentary, "A Smoking Hot Truth," examines controversial evidence linking Gemma to rapid melting of the polar ice caps.
*rolls* |
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saralynn Lonely Fan
Joined: 15 Oct 2006 Posts: 227
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Posted: Wed Nov 01, 2006 5:14 pm Post subject: |
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Cute post, and somewhat sad because the comment about Al Gore is accurate enough -- that if he reads it -- he might actually do it.
It took me a minute to get the Kelvin joke too. It's been too long since science class! |
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cup o' noodles The Order of Denderah
Joined: 25 Sep 2006 Posts: 4590 Location: Worshipping Corky Dominguez (Hahaha)
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Posted: Wed Nov 01, 2006 8:10 pm Post subject: |
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this is officially my favorite post on this website! congratu-f*ckin'-lations! you rock! _________________ This world will never be what I expected.
And if I don't belong, who would have guessed it? |
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katz31 Enthusiastic Fan
Joined: 26 Sep 2006 Posts: 282
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Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 4:40 pm Post subject: |
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What about "Gemma is personally responsible for global warming."
Not that I think that personally.
Anyway, this reminds me of the Chuck Norris jokes. |
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weetziebat05 Lonely Fan
Joined: 25 Oct 2006 Posts: 129
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Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 5:00 pm Post subject: |
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lol same here.... _________________ Hey... I GOT IT! Oh... wait... never mind.
VGVhbSBPcCBGVFch |
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GoodGollyItsHolly P. Monkey's Agent
Joined: 19 Oct 2006 Posts: 2079 Location: Pacey Whitters Arms
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Languorous Lass The Order of Denderah
Joined: 24 Oct 2006 Posts: 2571 Location: Gone, baby, gone
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Posted: Thu Nov 02, 2006 5:51 pm Post subject: |
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saralynn wrote: | Cute post, and somewhat sad because the comment about Al Gore is accurate enough -- that if he reads it -- he might actually do it. |
Aw, do we really have to bring politics into this discussion? I come to this forum to get away from The Real World. I thought the post was funny, too, but there's no need to disrespect Al in order to appreciate what Gemma's Tool posted. |
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Max Suspiciously Absent
Joined: 13 Nov 2006 Posts: 1 Location: Studio City, California
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Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2006 11:22 pm Post subject: |
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When Gemma walks into water she doesnt get wet. The water gets Gemma. Chuck Norris is great, Gemma, well Amazing. =] |
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Mr. Roboto Suspiciously Absent
Joined: 13 Nov 2006 Posts: 9
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Posted: Mon Nov 13, 2006 11:32 pm Post subject: |
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Haha, brilliant. _________________ Don't tell me again. |
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CriticalThinking Enthusiastic Fan
Joined: 15 Sep 2006 Posts: 413 Location: Pervy Town by way of Florida
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Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 3:04 pm Post subject: |
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Lord Balto Casual Observer
Joined: 24 Nov 2006 Posts: 99 Location: Balmer, Merlin
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Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 5:36 pm Post subject: |
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Quote: | Salsa at restaurants and grocers everywhere is now available in three varieties - mild, medium and Gemma. |
Not to mention sushi restaurants, thus explaining the poisoning of former Russian spy Alexander Litvinenko at a sushi joint in London. The British authorities have actually misidentified Gemmonium 216 as Polonium 210.
Beware, The Order is even more powerful than the Illuminati and we are ALL in imminent danger. _________________ SEF |
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kageyuki P. Monkey's Agent
Joined: 29 Nov 2006 Posts: 2209 Location: over your shoulder
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Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 6:07 pm Post subject: |
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Lord Balto wrote: | Quote: | Salsa at restaurants and grocers everywhere is now available in three varieties - mild, medium and Gemma. |
Not to mention sushi restaurants, thus explaining the poisoning of former Russian spy Alexander Litvinenko at a sushi joint in London... |
*confused* Huh? What did Alexander Litvinenko at a sushi restaurant in London have to do with this... or with salsa?? Salsa doesn't go with sushi... _________________ ~ kageyuki... aka Agent Wasabi
that's all there is to say about that... say anything else and it'll make you look stupid.
I <3 SARAH!!! |
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Lord Balto Casual Observer
Joined: 24 Nov 2006 Posts: 99 Location: Balmer, Merlin
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Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 4:57 am Post subject: |
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Just being funny/ironic. Sorry if I missed the mark. _________________ SEF |
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stuart2004 The Order of Denderah
Joined: 09 Nov 2006 Posts: 2735
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Posted: Tue Dec 12, 2006 7:00 am Post subject: |
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I used to be all like "A PI IS HEAVEN" but now due to gemma I am all like "DONT A PI IS HEAVEN" _________________ Official Guard dog of the LG Defense Force
https://mlawrence5.qhealthbeauty.com/Default.aspx
antagonist of the LG Defense Force |
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