Five's a Crowd

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Episode 271/2x116
Five's a Crowd

You want me to sleep with the blonde chicks?!

Blogger Steve
Date Posted May 28th, 2008
Forum 762|3=lg15}}
Length 3:17
Description Anyone for pick and mix?
Location(s) Theatre
YouTube Tags KateModern LG15 lonelygirl15 Steve
Production Credits
Executive Producer(s) Miles Beckett and Greg Goodfried
Co-Executive Producer(s) Joanna Shields and Amanda Goodfried
On-Set Producer Louis Figgis
Line Producer Kelly Brett
Production Co-Ordinator Claire Finbow
Interactive Co-ordinator(s) Jonathan Almond
Production Runner(s) Meryl Iona Edwards
Director(s) Yusuf Pirhasan
Head Writer Luke Hyams
Vidplay Lawrence Tallis
Story Luke Hyams, Neil Mossey, and Lawrence Tallis
Editor(s) John Palmer
Jeremy Yusuf Pirhasan
Steve Giles Alderson
Balthazar Louis Figgis
Meryl Meryl Iona Edwards
Jennifer Hannah Templeton Cox
Charlie Tara Rushton
Adjacent Blogs
Previous "Bump in the Night"
Next "Didn't They Do Well!"
Previous by Steve "Back on Brick Lane"
Next by Steve "Disconnect With Me"
Directly before "Skittle Pickle"

Five's a Crowd is the two-hundred seventy-first webisode in the KateModern video series. It is also the one-hundred sixteenth video of season two.


Text: KateModern contains products which have been included within the show on behalf of Skittles.

(Jeremy adjusts the camera and turns it around to show he is following Steve and a few other Celestial Network members.)

Steve: It has come to my attention, friends, that our joyous union is still falling predominantly on deaf ears. The-the current social climate means that the vast majority of people are still unsympathetic to our cause. We-we are taught from an early age to isolate ourselves from others; to be suspicious of those who are truly happy.

Celestial Network member: Hear, hear.

Steve: I mean, we are in the grips of a national epidemic of, um...

Balthazar: Cynicism?

Steve: Cynicism! That's right, Balthazar. And paranoia. But it doesn't have to be this way. We need to awaken the masses from their myopic slumber and open their eyes to the true possibilities of love and happiness on this earthly realm. And we can do that together; as a team, all of us. And one day, soon, everyone will realize the power that this can bring. Love is such a wonderful thing! And everyone in the world will know that we started this, something so special. All in our hearts; that's where it comes from. Oh, and there's Charlie.

(Steve motions to Charlie sitting down the street.)

Charlie! Hey!

(Cut to Steve talking with Charlie.)

Steve: How are you? (Kisses Charlie on the cheek.)

Charlie: I didn't think you were bringing your fan club along with you, though, tonight, to be honest. Can I talk to you for a second?

Steve: Well, of course you can.

Charlie: Wh-what the hell are they doing here? Why would you bring those girls along with you?

Steve: Charlie, love is a wonderful thing, and it should be shared with the whole world.

Charlie: So you've been sharing your love with those two blonde chicks, have you?

(Jeremy pans back to the Celestial Network members.)

Steve: Charlie...

Charlie: And who said anything about love? I mean, I thought we were gonna take things easy for the first time in our lives.

Steve: Yeah, that's not what I meant.

Charlie: I don't care what you meant, this is sick. I don't want to be going on dates with your fan club.

Steve: Charlie, you need to open your mind. We're t- we're trying to, uh, get out of the confines of steady proscriptive relationships.

Charlie: I don't care what you're trying to do. It's me or them. You can't have both. (Begins to walk away, but stops and turns.) And certainly not at the same time. (Walks away.)

(Steve sighs and Jeremy turns the camera, finding a poster for The Waiting Room.)

Steve: No- No, it's fine, Jeremy. It's fine. When I say "I want you to film everything", I mean it. Because it's gonna be so enlightening for the public when they see Charlie's transformation and she realizes the true potential of the Celestial Network.

Jeremy: Do you really think she'll come 'round?

Steve: Yeah, I'm positive. Soon Charlie will awaken to the true possibilities that the Network can reveal. To the true power of love. (Steve grabs the two girls' hands.) Come on. Now who's for pick and mix?

Celestial Network member: Yeah, definitely.

Steve: You like bon bons, don't you?

(Balthazar smiles at the camera as they follow Steve into the theatre.)

Steve: This way for fun...