The Ice Man

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Episode 144/1x144
The Ice Man

KM0145-Terrence.JPG
Unfortunately, also not Cliff Richard.

Blogger Gavin
Date Posted December 24th, 2007
URL youtube.com
Length 2:47
Description I would have done anything to get out of the house. Anything but this...
Location(s) London
YouTube Tags KateModern LG15 lonelygirl15 Gavin
Production Credits
Executive Producer(s) Miles Beckett and Greg Goodfried
Co-Executive Producer(s) Joanna Shields and Amanda Goodfried
Associate Producer(s) Cristy Coors Beasley
Series Producer(s) Pete Gibbons
Line Producer Kelly Brett
Production Co-Ordinator Claire Finbow
Interactive Co-ordinator(s) Jonathan Almond
Production Runner(s) Meryl Iona Edwards
Director(s) Luke Taylor (BigBalls Films)
Head Writer Luke Hyams
Vidplay Luke Hyams
Story Miles Beckett, Luke Hyams, and Hazel Grian
Editor(s) Yusuf Pirhasan
Cast
Gavin Ralf Little
Terrence Matthew Gammie
Kate's Watcher Pete Gibbons
Adjacent Blogs
Previous "Coming Home for Xmas"
Next "War is Over"
Previous by Gavin "Grabbed By The Bells"
Next by Gavin "Frozen Friendship"
Directly after "KateModern Week 22 Recap"

The Ice Man is the one-hundred forty-fourth webisode in the KateModern video series.

Transcript

(Gavin is inside Terrence's car at a service station. The camera pans around and eventually zooms in on the steering wheel, which displays the Aston Martin emblem. Gavin then brings the camera to look at his face.)

Gavin: Wh-who were you expecting? Cliff-bloody-Richard? Yeah, no such luck. Well, this has to be the weirdest Christmas I've ever experienced. First up, on Friday, Charlie came 'round with Kate in tow, saying that they wanted to stay over Christmas. Well, that took me completely by surprise. And... Well, it's not all exactly "Jingle Bells" in the flat, either. The demon art student hasn't got a single word to say for herself, and Charlie's gone into full-on bloody Stepford Wife mode trying to pretend to herself and everybody else that everything's perfectly fine. It's doing my head in! And if I'm totally honest, I would- would have given anything to get out of the house, but... Well, now... Things have all slightly gone wr-...

(Terrence opens the car door and gets in. The camera pans over to show him.)

Terrence: What are you doing?

Gavin: Uhm... Just, uh... I'll put it away.

Terrence: No, no, no, no, no, no. Don't put it away. (Puts the key in the ignition.) We're, uh... We're gonna want to show everyone our little Christmas present. (Puts on his seatbelt.)

Gavin: Well, uh... I was just thinking about that, and, actually... I-I was just thinking, I-I-I could do with going and seeing Auntie Joan, really.

Terrence: Auntie Joan? What a good idea. Can I come? (Gavin looks worriedly at the camera as they start to drive away. Terrence begins singing "The Christmas Song".) "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire"...

(Cut to Gavin closing the car door behind him. He follows Terrence, who is carrying a flashlight, to a van.)

Gavin: Um, Terrence? Where e- where exactly are we going?

Terrence: I told you, it's a surprise.

Gavin: (Whispering to the camera.) He wouldn't kill me at Christmas, would he? Jesus wouldn't like it. Oh, please just tell me this is just because you've stolen a load of frozen turkeys.

Terrence: Gav, please. I'm not a bloody criminal. I'm, uh- I'm just a man looking for all his Christmas dreams to, uh... (Opens the back door of the van, revealing the Watcher. He shines the flashlight in his face.) To come true. (Beats the Watcher over the head with the flashlight and closes the door.) ...So! Send a little message to his bosses, shall we? (Leans in closely to the camera.) Unless you want to leave your muscle-head to permanently turn into Frosty the Snowman, I wanna find my stolen software under my Christmas tree. Understood? ... Did you get that?

Gavin: Yeah, I got it.

Terrence: Right. Well, let's get you home, so, uh, you can upload it and we can watch Midnight Mass. (Walks toward the car.)

Gavin: Wait... Are we just gonna leave him in there?

Terrence: Certainly am.

Gavin: (Pans the camera toward Terrence.) But, um... He'll die.

Terrence: Yeah, eventually.

Gavin: Well... Um... (Pans the camera back to the van.) Shit. (Follows Terrence toward the car.) D-, uh, Does this mean you don't need that flash drive with all the girls' names on it anymore?

Terrence: Gav... You couldn't, uh, put a word in for me with Charlie's mate Kate, could you? You know, I- I love a tasty blonde.

Gavin: Uh... Yeah.

Terrence: Oh, magic. (Continues to the car.)

Gavin: Terrence, the flash drive... Um...

Notes

  • While it is not shown in the video where exactly the van was parked, it can be inferred that it is somewhere near Burdett Road in East London, due to the service station shown at the beginning.