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Episode 107/1x107

The mysterious green stuff is not a slurpee.

Blogger Gavin
Date Posted November 12th, 2007
URL youtube.com
Length 1:49
Description Not sure what, im doinggg – bit pisst. Ha ha
Location(s) Aunt Joan's house
YouTube Tags KateModern LG15 lonelygirl15 Gavin
Production Credits
Executive Producer(s) Miles Beckett and Greg Goodfried
Co-Executive Producer(s) Joanna Shields and Amanda Goodfried
Associate Producer(s) Cristy Coors Beasley
Series Producer(s) Pete Gibbons
Line Producer Kelly Brett
Production Co-Ordinator Claire Finbow
Interactive Co-ordinator(s) Jonathan Almond
Production Runner(s) Meryl Iona Edwards
Director(s) Gavin Rowe (BigBalls Films)
Head Writer Luke Hyams
Vidplay Hazel Grian and Luke Hyams
Story Miles Beckett, Luke Hyams, and Hazel Grian
Editor(s) Yusuf Pirhasan
Gavin Ralf Little
Tariq Jai Rajani
Aunt Joan Margaret Hyams
Adjacent Blogs
Previous "The Leak"
Next "Hung Over"
Previous by Gavin "Subservient Lee"
Next by Gavin "Pass the Port"
Directly after "KateModern Week 16 Recap"

Pissed is the one-hundred seventh webisode in the KateModern video series.


(Gavin pours vodka into a cup in a room only lighted by a small lamp. Tariq is on Gavin's left. Both seem drunk)

Gavin: More vodka, sir?

Tariq: Hey!

Gavin: Whoa, whoa, whoa.

(Gavin fixes camera)

Tariq: Should we look pretty?

Gavin: Here's to Lee, right?

Tariq: Lee?

Gavin: Yeah, to Lee. You got to hand it to him. He has well and truly, massively kicked us in the nuts.

Tariq: Oh, man. He has. (holding one finger) With one foot!

Gavin: With a--with a hoof. (Scene cuts to Gavin and Tariq laughing, clinking classes) Chin-chin.

Tariq: Yes!

Gavin: How could he do that to someone? He's shown all our secrets to the world. All our trade secrets. That software was worth a fortune.

Tariq: He's an ungrateful bastard.

Gavin: Yeah. Yeah, he is. And after all we've done for him, how could he just turn on us like that?

Tariq: Yes!

(Gavin holding a nut cracker at the back of the scene. Scene cuts again as he lies next to Tariq)

Gavin: I'm gonna crack his nuts. Yeah, and then I'm gonna get that chef and-- (snaps nut cracker multiple times) See? Then I'm going to get Ramsey, and I'm going to go "Oy! Gordo! G-Dog! Here's some... um..." (Gavin waves his hands about) "...what do they call... Gordo, here's some sweetbreads; fry them, and serve them to that kid over there..." (Gavin and Tariq both point directly at the camera) "...Lee, the one who's crying because he's got no nuts because, because he's been made to eat his bollocks..." (Tariq laughs drunkenly) "...in hell's kitchen." (Gavin snaps nut cracker multiple times and Tariq laughs loudly)

(A light comes on in the background, a door opens and Aunt Joan enters the room. Gavin and Tariq turn around, and Gavin accidentally knocks over a lamp with the nut cracker. The lamp falls on Tariq. Gavin and Tariq look sheepish.)

Gavin: Auntie, where have you been?

(Tariq crawls towards camera.)

Aunt Joan: I've been in my bed, trying to sleep.

(Tariq knocks camera over to one side; Gavin looks at the camera and laughs quietly while he picks up the lamp. Aunt Joan can be seen in the background. The camera is now almost upside down.)

Aunt Joan: And you've drunk all the sherry.

Gavin: Yeah.

(Gavin hands Aunt Joan a blue bottle.)

Aunt Joan: And all the green stuff.

Gavin: Yeah.

Aunt Joan: I can't believe that.

Gavin: Sorry.

Aunt Joan: Get some sleep.

Gavin and Tariq: Yes Auntie Joan.

(Scene cuts to a darkened room: Tariq is laughing and his rear end is facing towards the camera.)

(Scene cuts to Gavin and Tariq lying on the floor.)

Tariq: Gav?

Gavin: Yeah?

(Tariq sits up.)

Tariq: Well what are we going to do now?

(Gavin sits up.)

Gavin: I don't know.

(Gavin reaches forward and turns off the camera.)


  • This is the first appearance of Aunt Joan since Spiders, 102 episodes ago.
  • In America, to be 'pissed' means to be very angry. For the English, however, it means that a person is heavily intoxicated as well as to be very angry.
  • Lee commented: "Tariq in a vest...what a disgusting sight. Oh yeah...look who's got a Bebo page!," which may mean Lee is going to become a more important character.